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Apparently some 10 people visit this site every day.
[Says my counter which frequently lies about things like that. It also lies about who it's been SLEEPING WITH!]
Anyhoo, if you 10 people are real, then I guess this means I have to start like updating more frequently or whatever. Cause if I were you, I'd be really pissed if I checked back and that lazy bum Tom hadn't gotten off his ass and put anything together for my/your enjoyment. You know?
So here's what I got in leiu of the news:
[News sources curtosy of new.google.com]
1. Uday and Qusay Hussein Buried
That's what you get when you mess with a country full of SUV-driving, cell-phone-wheilding, pissed-off-rich-white people. Don't mess.
2. U.S., N. Korea to Meet 1-on-1: Talks to be during
discussions on nukes
Kim Jong-Il: You got any warheads?
Bush: I dunno. Do you?
Kim Jong-Il: Maybe.
Bush: Um... well, we have 10.
Kim Jong-Il: Ha ha! We have 20! North Korea schools the pathetic asses of the Americans!
[Collin Powell pistol-whips Kim Jong-Il from behind.]
3. Microsoft's Web Site Brought Down By Attack
I actually remember when that happened.
4. U.S. vehicle sales down despite incentives
Cry about it.
5. Ethan wants to kill Jerod-From-Subway with a
Power to the people man... Power to the people.
6. Senator Says RIAA Subpoenas Could Harm Innocent
About time. This guy knows where its at. He's fighting for the fact that all people are morons and didn't know what they were doing was wrong. I figure if people really are as stupid as he says they are, I might as well pretend to be a moron if not just for the coushy legal protection.
7. That move with 'J. Lo' and Ben Uhfleck Sucked Big
That's about it for the news. I have one more thing
[It's Called Soap-Connection.]
Basically we make these huge, gigantic blocks of soap, like the size of houses. Then you let people go to whichever one they want and cut off however much soap they need with like machetes. Anyway, it works like a dating service. Deep with in the human subconscious is the part of you that tells you what soap you like. It's been proven by all kinds of scientific stuff that I'm pulling out of my ass [not literally] that people who's soap-preferances are in sync have more like 'together' vibes. Really.
So you go to your favorite soap thing and that's how you meet
people you know you will be good with.
Or... something. I'm still trying to figure out where I'm going to get that much soap.
1 Cowboy could take on the entire North Korean Military Force.
No Joke, we are that cool.
Replies: 2 Buddies Neglected Their Oral Hygiene
Watch what you eat, or I'll blow up a tool shed with your bodily fluids. Subway is very susceptible to human fat soap production byproduct bombs.
Posted by Jaetei @ 08/03/2003 01:03 AM CST
Yeah im commenting cause Tom told me a while ago and i haven't and im practically selling my soul for chanel pictures that my computer cant load. right, and ben AFFLECK is amazing hot and i would do him.
Posted by Kate @ 08/02/2003 07:12 PM CST