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09/28/2003 Archived Entry: "Rebel Rebel"

Ok, I have to go quick, or else I won't meet my 7-day-update-deadline.

LOTS of crap to talk about today. We'll start at the beginning of the week:

A little update on our friend Beth. He wrote 'The Ramones' on his chuck taylors. he is SO punk. He also has some kind of freaky oragami fettish. Everything Mr. Provencher hands out gets turned into a crane. I gave him a 'what the fuck?' look. It didn't seen to have any effect on Beth whatsoever.

In debate during the week, we were working on stuff, and I said something. And by some miracle, a spit bubble flew out. An honest to god bubble, maybe 2 CM wide [ghetto metric system]. And it floated around, and landed on the evidence I was using. and popped. Then it was more gross than cool, but for a little bit there... oh man... it was beautiful.

Then you've got Sean's blog. Poor, poor sean. Something got jacked at his house so now he can't update his own little blog. Everyone feel bad for him. I know how painful it can be. So anyway, I'm updating his for him temporarily, and I read a little bit more of it. It's really good! So here you go Sean, here is your

Official Hyperlink of Mondo-Fandom!!!

There you are. Everyone visit, it really is pretty rad.

Now we have the toothpaste situation. My sister recently decided that she was 'to good' for the kids fun cavity protection toothpaste. She gets all uppity with her 'mint whitening' shit. Well you know what?! Screw you AND your toothpaste. I like the Kids Fun Cavity Protection kind, and I'm going to stick to it. Anything else just tastes like... gross... paste... whatever. Blue Sparkly Toothpaste all the way!

On the topic of acting like a complete child, I got a new toy yesterday. It's called 'Wing Gundam' and it is very, very awesome. Not only does it have a big-ass gun, and gigantor sheild, but it also has wings. Hence the name. And as if that wasn't cool enough, it can transform into this [bird thing]. Plus I read something that is entirely true:

The only difference
between men and boys
is the price of their toys

[That is so me.]

Right. Now we arrive at today. Today was FILLED with excitement. The day opens with me waking up, eating breakfast-for-lunch. I then join up with the gang: Rachel, Hank, Claire, Hope and Marian The Ninja. We venture far and wide to the realm of the afforementioned Sean Svadlenak. Unfortunatly for us, Sean isn't home. We're just about to walk home, defeated, when a squad car pulls up across the street.

So we sat down to watch. At first, we thought they were coming to pick us up for loitering, but instead they went to this house accross the street. One cop stood to the side of the door, while one stood in front of it. The door opened, and they went in. We're thinking this is like a meth lab bust or something...

We walk on by to get a better look inside the house, and stop at the corner, when along comes a discreet child-molester van [DON'T ask] with KCMO Police prited on the side. 'Oh Fuck' we think, 'This could be really serious.' And minutes later, *honk honk weeeeeoooooeeeeeeoooo braaaaaaaaaaaaaa* 2 fucking fire trucks come barreling down the next street. They go the other way. 2 seconds later: *honk honk weeeeeoooooeeeeeeoooo braaaaaaaaaaaaaa* they pull up and PARK IT in front of the house the cops went into.

Finally, the ambulence even showed up. It was like the 'emergency crew' party of the year. We heard from laters neighbors later that some dude had had a heart attack... wtf? Lets think who showed up:

1. Cops
2. Fire Department

What does that mean?

Oh well. After that excitement died down, we walked literally 100 feet, and ran into this one dude. He had is car all decked out in "Operah for President" crap! And he had a t-shirt too. We went over and asked him what his deal was. He went all into this big deal about how he was going to get 10,000 petitions for the big O to run for the big P. He gave us all these hand outs and stuff.

So: Everyone and anyone who knows me, SIGN THE PETITION. We are going to help this old man so he can go down and have the TV people follow him to chicago and meet operah and ask her to run. ROCK ON OLD MAN!

[That's going to be me when I'm old... except I'll be petitioning Winona Reider to run for 'Local Idol' of my small, self centered universe...]

And so we end on a high note: Chick Tracts. These things are little comics made by psycho christans with WAAAAY to much time on their hands. They're all around offensive, and really degrading, so in mocking them, I used their own drawings but changed the words. Test groups [Ethan] have said they liked it, so I show it unto you: [Chick Tract Madness]

And that's a rap. I think I made the 12:00 deadline, so I bid you all a fair... a fair... whatever the hell you might go on to do...

Cowboys should run for president.
They'd fix the country real good.
[And by that I mean all the morons would be up against the wall.]

Replies: 5 Buddies Neglected Their Oral Hygiene

i hate that blue sparkly toothpaste crap. sorry. but no. yuk. X_X

Posted by /\139 @ 10/28/2003 06:01 PM CST

Yo, you got to calm down dude. You always post at the last minute, what is up with that?

Posted by Connor O'Dell @ 10/28/2003 05:58 AM CST

Thank you vewy much, tom. Blue sparkly toothpaste was my favorite as well...long long ago...

Posted by Sean @ 10/01/2003 09:34 PM CST

child molester van.
(nice chick tract.)

Posted by sarah @ 09/30/2003 10:55 PM CST

Jesus yelling hammer time is up there in humor.

Posted by Josh @ 09/30/2003 09:49 PM CST