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10/14/2003 Archived Entry: "An Ode to Maybe"

I first must appologize for the complete lack of updates. The crap-shooting action of my windows drive coupled with the marathon run that was last weekend kind of drove me into the ground.

Today though, I'm going to try and make retribution.

First and foremost: Anyone who knows Katie Fritz, the following applies to you-

1. Thank her for annoying me into doing this entry
2. Call her a whore for annoying me into doing this entry

That aside, let us begin.

Today at school was a jeans day. I wore jeans, my old navy '00 flag shirt, and my coat. All day! Hot-sweet-awesome coat action ALL DAY. I was pleased. As a whole though, the event kinda brought me down.

A lot of people wore their 'I did such-and-such sport' shirts. I got kinda depressed that I don't/can't play sports.
A lot of people wore their 'I am super conformist and popular' shirts. I got kinda depressed that these people are still alive.
A lot of people wore their 'I am female and have bodily contours' shirts. I got kinda depressed that I don't have... well... yeah.

On an earlier note, we finally have stickers! The original post regarding this was broken, so post a comment if you're interested. Happy thoughts and sexual favorts are to be forwarded to Hank Eddins to thank him for this contribution to the furtherment of Brakdom.

Something interesting about clothes: The left-side of the ass of my pants has a small hole in it becuase I carry my wallet in there. My mom patched it up. But its still there, and I walk around thinking: "That's right, you only wish the hole were bigger."

Then there's the spam in my email. Killer Analogy: The spam in my bulk mail folder can be likened to the dead zone in the Gulf of Mexico. [Non-debate folks: The deadzone is where all this fertilizer drained into the gulf of mexico, and then all the plants grew real fast, and choked out all other life. So its like this giant Massachusets-sized floating chunk of kelp.] The mail just sits there, doing nothing, being unread. I login and the screen reads:

You have 308 new messages:

Inbox (3) Bulk (305)

Is that like sad or what? One day I just decided to stop emptying it, and that was on september 27th. Needless to say, I get a lot of junk. I finally browsed the titles though the other day, and some of them were pretty interesting:

Alejandra Gill
^Gai,n _`P,ENIS" :MAS`S'; ' rzivhbrhcr
[I got teh post!!11!!!]

Gold Member
save HUGE on cigarettes
[No thanks. I prefer the crack.]

Saw YOU in church, loved what I saw.
[Hey look! Over there! *runs away*]

Gold Member
Tell your friends - 11 FreeCDs you get
[Sentance for is structure dorks]

Religious Dating here
[*continues running*]

Church Love
Some Christian Likes you

The Blue Pill
Change your love life forever
[Which blue pill?! There are so many!]

Your Books
Where Are The Best African-American Books?
[So Caucasian It Hurts, By Ethan Struby]

FreePepsi/Coke Drink
Re: Get F_R_E_E bottle of Pepsi or Coke - - limited time
[Fuck the soft drink industry. I take my battery acide straight.]

Re: See if you have HOT Flashes?
[Oh christ... my ovaries... they burn...]

Recall Gray Davis - Elect Arnold Schwarzenegger and get a Cool T-Shirt NOW!!----...
[Sorry. I already have my 'VoteNoOnReelectionYesOnBustamante.Com' T-Shirt framed.]

Apollo Medical
Be bigger and better in bed

Giant Breasts
It is all Natural
[...What if I want both?]

So, that is my spam. There's a lot of it. I wish there was a way to send package bombs to spammers, but unfortunatly, modern technology has yet to catch up with my sadism. Again, sorry for lack of update. Please enjoy todays blog goodness.

Cowboys don't type with their Penikses.

Replies: 13 Buddies Neglected Their Oral Hygiene

I would just like to say I knew about the Dead Zone prior to this entry thanks to Ms Kadow and Environmental Science.

Take that, you sleeve-slitted waterbottle! Avast ye!

Posted by Gina @ 11/04/2003 09:20 PM CST

"Don't Be Alone A Second Longer! "Ho! guests, what are you? Merchants or wandering thieves?" he bellowed"

"Hook Up With Gorgeous GirlS! father's guest as he delivered his speech; but when he came to that part"

"Never for cable again! taken that shape to mock him; for he affirmed that it was not in the power"

Those are all real. I need not add any comments, except to say I now block all junk mail, because it was just getting totally insane. (I wasn't getting much, but what I was getting was all nutso, and made me want to kill my neighbors)

Posted by J. Rockford Heschmeyer @ 10/30/2003 12:30 AM CST

i will now modify my G to a 9. my 1337 has been corrected. ps- sean, i read your blog. i really enjoyed it. i like linkin park too! and audioslave! ha, cool! if you're wondering why i don't email people, ask tom. he likes that whole issue.

Posted by /\1139R/\ @ 10/28/2003 05:59 PM CST

ah! 1337 is amazing! i was pretty proud of myself for being able to read that message down there from sean. i don't read 1337 too often, i just write my name in it. ^_^

Posted by /\113GR/\ @ 10/28/2003 05:51 PM CST

man, the post thing you have keeps taking out my ultra-1337 characters...

Posted by sean @ 10/27/2003 06:50 PM CST

0V3104D1N9 73H 5Y53M!

Posted by sean @ 10/27/2003 06:48 PM CST

Tom, I thinka you needa to updatea more often. Capisci?!

I require more online periodicals to feed my seething mass! [think akira!]

Posted by sean @ 10/27/2003 06:45 PM CST

also, upon looking up this katie girl, i disagree with her. i like you, tom. you are cool. ish. kinda.

just kidding. you're hysterical.


Posted by see previous @ 10/26/2003 11:19 PM CST

nice. i liked the spam comments. that was fabulous. actually, i really enjoyed the shirt bit too. the girls with the bodily contour shirts are irritating. girls at sion...don't even get me started on girls who SHOULDN'T wear tight clothing.

i have to agree with the "no one in particular" on the shirt thing. i found it curious that you would wear such an article of clothing. conformity = crap does it not?

yeah, well, consider yourself loved since i'm commenting.


ps- the whole typing with your fifth appendage thing? kinda creeps me out. that's definately in my top ten uncomfy list.

Posted by hotaru (the annoying one) @ 10/26/2003 11:13 PM CST

You know, upon further review, the letters k and s are pretty far away on the keybroad so efen ig ypu wdre typong wity ypur peniks, it'd habe do strecj prettt fae.

Juxt sayinf.

Posted by sean @ 10/19/2003 11:12 PM CST


Posted by katie @ 10/17/2003 07:21 AM CST

an old navy flag shirt,eh? Whos the super-conformist now?!?

Posted by no one in preticular @ 10/17/2003 07:17 AM CST


Posted by rachel @ 10/15/2003 07:17 AM CST